Today we are going to speak about a very 'private matter'. SEX. Well, kind of sex, more like a humpy-dumpy between a dog and their hooman. I must admit - this is something new to our pack, as the first humper we have ever met is little Bohemia. And the weirdest thing of all - she likes to hump mommy - and only mommy. I know, she is really strange - I always thought she is a bit of a boy-girl and now I have proof. But mommy is getting rather upset, especially when Bohemia jumps her in front of other people. This is so not right! I am sorry for mommy, but I also cannot stop laughing, as it looks so silly. To help mom, I did some research on humpy behaviour and here is what I have found.

Why does my dog only hump one hooman family member? Actually it seems, that your dog could be humping only one particular hooman because they’re excited to see them and they know that this person will not punish them for such behaviour. (YES - THAT IS FOR SURE TRUE. Bohemia would be afraid to hump daddy, as he would not be as as forgiving as mom) Other reasons can include anxiety, attention seeking, lack of exercise, playfulness, and sometimes also sexual arousal. But - as I learned from reading up - a dog humping a hooman isn’t about sex most of the time…(OHHHH, I am relieved)  

And here are the Top Humping Reasons:

  #1 You as a hooman excite your pup like no other family member Dogs are full of energy and it’s natural for them to get excited often. Like when you arrive back at home and they greet you at the door. Your dog could might pick up your special hooman scent and your own level of excitement, so he/she just gets even more excited and humping is just a way of showing it. Apparently this s is especially true with high-energy dogs - like my little sister.   #2: They are not afraid to hump that hooman Let’s get into this a little more. Maybe if they hump any other family member (daddy), that person would raise their voice, or even punish them...? So that means no fun, so why not try with the least 'dangerous' pack member.   #3: Your doggie just wants your attention Weird way to ask for attention, right? But hey, if you don’t give in to the barks or scratches they have to try different methods to get noticed. Remember that giving your dog any kind of attention equals to rewarding them, yes, even if the attention is negative. Anything is more rewarding to a dog, than being ignored.

#4: Your dog wants to play Your dog might hump your leg or hand, as part of a game. This is especially true when you and your dog are excitedly playing a game and all of a sudden your dog starts humping you. They just get a little over-excited, a behaviour mostly seen with puppies and younger dogs.   #5: Sexual arousal Most pawrents think this is the reason their dog is humping them. But to know if this is really true, observe when the humping occurs. Humping occurring due to sexual arousal can be seen in puppies and young dogs that haven’t been neutered.   #6: Lack of exercise A dog that doesn't have physical stimulation might revert to humping, as without some good work-outs their energy starts to pent up. And when they see you, they direct all that bundled up energy towards you. So just try to make sure your pup gets plenty of exercise!

#7: Dogs are genetically programmed to exhibit humping behavior This applies to both males and females. Humping is natural and harmless and yes - FUN! You could reduce the sexual desire by neutering your dog.   #8: Habitual behavior When your dog sees humping as a key to relieving stress, humping can become habitual.   #9: Social status This only applies to dog - to - dog humping. Some dogs might hump others to establish their place in the pack. The 'humper' is the one that wants to dominate and the dog that is being humped can either 'accept' or show dislike by growling and showing the teeth. The dog who is humping may have or not have an erection, bu it is important to know that an erection is not necessarily an indication of a high sex drive. BUT MOST IMPORTANT: A dog humping his/her hooman is NOT trying to dominate that person. Domination behavior is common in dog-to-dog communication but doesn’t apply to dog-hooman relationships. Believing that your dog is humping you because they want to be the ‘alpha’ in the family, can lead to confusion in some pet-parents and may even cause future harm to their pets. (some pawrents resort to dangerous training methods to eliminate the behavior)   #10: Itchy genitals Yes, just an itch can cause humpies. If your dog has a skin infection it can lead to itching and one of the easiest ways to scratch their genitals would be to rub them against another dog’s (hooman's) body through humping. To rule this possibility out, keep a close eye on your dog's private parts. If there is some sort of rush, discolouration or discharge - you better see your VET.

#11: Boredom Yup - this can be a reason too. Boredom comes from a lack of mental and physical stimulation and can lead to humping as a way to get entertained. Just try playing more with your dog and see if the behaviour stops.   #12: Poor socialization If a dog hasn’t been properly socialised as a puppy, he/she might compensate by humping their hooman or objects. This is just a sign that they crave contact and perceive humping a pillow or toy, as a sort of interaction. This is very true for little Bohemia, who is a COVID-PU. Not much interaction while in lock-down, so she really needs to catch up on other doggies now.   #13: It feels soooo good Let's face it - all mammals masturbate and dogs make no exception. Humping is just part of life and if you catch your dog in the act of humping a pillow or a stuffed toy, don’t be too quick to judge them. As long as he/she isn’t causing any trouble, there’s no harm in letting them enjoy. And yes, even neutered dogs do this, as they’re still able to experience physical sensations.

STOP HUMPING ME SOLUTIONS

1. Start by creating a special command to show that this behaviour is not okay. You can pick something simple like ‘BAD DOGGIE’, ‘NO’, ‘Stop’, 'Away' or ‘Get off’. Any of these words and phrases probably work best if you’ve used them previously to stop your dog from doing something naughty.
2. After you say that special command, turn around and ignore your dog. In case the dog continues what he/she was busy doing, just get up and walk away. Best to go somewhere they cannot find you - stay there for a few minutes and 'hide'.
3. After few minutes return to the dog and ask him/her to perform a certain action such as sit, roll over, lie down, or stand up... After they do what you wanted of them, praise them verbally by saying ‘good dog’ and give them a small treat from Cooka's Cookies.